Baby Steps

On Thanksgiving day, we were sharing what we were thankful for - family, friends, etc. when Baylie informed us that Jalen was thankful for the blinds. I guess that's true since he's already loved the ones in his bedroom and the living room to the point of breaking.

And here's our big boy walking. Before the camera started rolling, Jalen took four pretty good steps.

Melt My Heart

Today I was feeding Jalen when someone came to the door. While I was at the door, I could hear him crying in the background. At some point he stopped and I didn't think much about it until I came back inside and saw this.

I love how much my kids love each other. This just melted my heart.

I think there was as much on the bib as in his mouth. Also, note the overall strap.

Disney Analogies

I watch too many princess movies. So many that I'm starting to over analyze them. For example:

• After Eric and Ariel got married, did everyone in the kingdom stop eating fish? If so, what about the fishing industry? It seemed to be pretty big there in the kingdom and I would think all the fishermen would resent the new princess. (BTW - Does any one else see a concern in the fact that Ariel's seashells leave little to the imagination? I like Ariel, but she comes across as a major airhead to me.)
  
  
• What is the name of Snow White's prince? Does the fact that he has a nice singing voice really make him marriage material since he doesn't seem to have any other redeeming qualities?
  
  
• Prince Phillip is a studly prince while I think the Snow White prince seems wimpy. If I had to be woken up by a kiss, I'd definitely want Phillip over the other.
  
  
• Why don't the princes have mothers? Is that to avoid problems with the mothers in law?
  
  
• Why if the kings are short and fat are their sons tall and handsome?
  
  
• Does anyone else think the princesses are kind of easy since they kiss even before the first date and get married right away?
  
  
• I think Mulan and Tiana are the best heroines because they are smart and have some skills. They also end up with hunky guys, which is only fair. Plus, their men have to do more than just wake them up with a kiss or put a shoe on them.

I had more deep thoughts, but I have forgotten them. I'll have to come add them later as I think of them.

Photos Not Making It Into the Christmas Card

1. tired kids + frustrated mom + hungry dad = less than desirable photos
   
   
2. it does not help when a picture perfect family is taking awesome pictures with a professional photographer right next to your family meltdown

Updates

First, THANKS to all the veterans who have served our country.

Second, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DAD! I love you.

Third, Baylie is having FUN with Thanksgiving projects.

Fourth, Jalen continues to eat us out of house and home. The boy is HUMONGOUS!

Here are his latest stats as of today (9 months, 3 weeks).

Height - 28 1/2 inches (37%)

Weight - 27 lbs. 12 oz. (98%)

Head - 18 1/2 inches (83%)

(Guess he thinks mom's body type is the best.)

I'm trying to get him into the football groove early. So far, he just eats that too.

Fifth, Baylie and Jalen both got flu shots.

Time Jalen cried about it: 2.5 seconds

Time Baylie cried about it: 60 minutes

Adoption Financing - Update

After we adopted Baylie, I did a post on adoption financing. A lot of things have changed since then, so I thought I'd post an update on how the finances broke down for Jalen's adoption. He was born in Virginia, so we had travel expenses with him that we did not have with Baylie. We were fortunate to have friends in the area or our expenses would have been higher. We were in the Virginia area for two weeks before coming home. (The length of time you spend out of state is not up to you, it's up to the local government who must clear you to leave.)

This is primarily information for couples considering adoption since it is sometimes hard to get specifics. Of course, every adoption is different, but this will give you a rough idea.

Costs

• Home Study Update - $300 (this needs to be done each year, otherwise you have to get a new home study, which is usually $800-$1,000)
• Physical exams - $60
• Criminal background checks - $20
• Placement fee - $18,500 (we didn’t have a separate match fee because it happened so quickly)
• Hotel – $618
• Flights – $870 (I worked for an airline, so we flew standby going home, which saved a lot of money)
• Baggage fees - $95
• Car rental - $437
• Parking - $56
• Miscellaneous travel expenses (food, gas, etc.) - $750
• Phone (above regular bill) - $159
• Attorney fees - $836.50 (our attorney has a goal to keep adoptions under $1,000.00)
• Postage - $34 (this doesn’t inclue the pictures we send to the birthmom each month)
• Post placement visits - $300 (two visits)
• Gift for birth mother - $200
• Nursery bill - $392
• Copies of adoption decree - $30
• Birth certificates - $70

The exact total for Jalen’s adoption was $24,506. This is comparable to what other couples have paid for their agency adoptions, although some pay much more.

Financial Assistance

• Adoption Tax Credit – This has recently undergone a wonderful change for couples wanting to adopt. The credit is now refundable, meaning that you get the amount in a lump sum whether or not you paid that amount in taxes. Currently the amount is adoption expenses up to $13,170. It is also retroactive, so if you adopted in the past five years it might also apply. The current plan applies if you adopt through June 2011 and finalize before the end of the year 2011. After that, the law may undergo another change. (To the insensitive soul who informed me people only adopt to get money, that still leaves us over $11,000 in the hole for Jalen’s adoption and over $12,000 for Baylie's. I want to slap you.) Be sure to hire a good adoption tax expert. It’s worth it.

• State Adoption Indemnity - Some states allow an insurance reimbursement when you adopt. This only applies if you have an insurance program for which you pay directly. It does not apply if your insurance is paid for by an employer and deducted from your salary.

• Employer Adoption Programs - Many companies have an adoption reimbursement policy.
  
  
• Grants/Loans – There are several adoption grants and loans, but I have yet to meet or hear of anyone that actually received one. We spent $45 for six different programs, but didn’t receive assistance from any of them.
  
  
• Home Equity Loans - One of the most common methods for financing adoption is through home equity loans.
  
  
• Retirement Accounts - If you decide to cash in a 401K in order to finance an adoption, any penalties that would be applied may actually be covered by the adoption tax credit.

For us, we found it best to come up with the money on our own. We were greatly supported by family and would not have been able to adopt without them. We also sold our second car and had three different yard/bake sales.

Unless you’re able to find a birthmom on your own or are able to adopt through LDS Family Services, adoption is going to be expensive. But it’s worth every last penny!