When we got to the hospital, we were reminded of recent policies that don't allow children in. Since we had Baylie, we couldn't meet Willie's birthmother together (I'm not using her name or details about her in order to protect her privacy). One of us had to stay with Baylie. This proved to be a stressful thing for us throughout the day. I decided to meet her first.
I can't really describe the feeling of knocking on a hospital room door and entering to meet the mother of your future child. I'm not sure how I felt: excited? invasive? nervous? She was holding her little baby. I asked her if she was okay and if she was comfortable with her decision. She asked if I wanted to hold the baby. I told her no, that I would have plenty of time to hold him and I wanted her to hold him as long as possible. I showed her the picture we had brought for her of our family. I'm not sure if she knew about Baylie before that, but she seemed relieved to see the picture. We talked a little bit about ourselves. She was a sweet girl and she loved her little boy. Later in the day as I heard her talking to her sister on the phone, she cried as she explained that she had to do this because she knew it was the best thing for her baby. It brought tears to my eyes as well.
Throughout the day David and I traded places, alternately spending time with her and with Baylie. Baylie was a trooper, but it was a hard day for her. At about 3:00 p.m., I realized I hadn't fed her. Poor thing.
We didn't get discharged from the hospital until 6:00 p.m. (Willie's birthmom had already left.) We were exhausted. I had stayed up all night on Tuesday working on a present for my mom's birthday, Wednesday night we had spent flying and now it was Thursday night. I think we were all about ready to crash. But in the end, we had our little boy and we headed to our hotel.
Legally when you adopt a child, you can name the baby whatever you want. In the case of Baylie, we have a closed adoption, so we gave her a completely different name from the one her birthmother had selected. In the case of Willie, his birthmother seemed very concerned that we would change his name, so out of respect to her, we added the first name she had chosen to the name we had already selected. She had named him Jalin.
We knew what his official name was and we tried calling him variations on it: Jalin, Will, William, Waylan, etc. In the end, we settled on Willie. I think that will eventually become Will.
I can't really describe the feeling of knocking on a hospital room door and entering to meet the mother of your future child. I'm not sure how I felt: excited? invasive? nervous? She was holding her little baby. I asked her if she was okay and if she was comfortable with her decision. She asked if I wanted to hold the baby. I told her no, that I would have plenty of time to hold him and I wanted her to hold him as long as possible. I showed her the picture we had brought for her of our family. I'm not sure if she knew about Baylie before that, but she seemed relieved to see the picture. We talked a little bit about ourselves. She was a sweet girl and she loved her little boy. Later in the day as I heard her talking to her sister on the phone, she cried as she explained that she had to do this because she knew it was the best thing for her baby. It brought tears to my eyes as well.
Throughout the day David and I traded places, alternately spending time with her and with Baylie. Baylie was a trooper, but it was a hard day for her. At about 3:00 p.m., I realized I hadn't fed her. Poor thing.
We didn't get discharged from the hospital until 6:00 p.m. (Willie's birthmom had already left.) We were exhausted. I had stayed up all night on Tuesday working on a present for my mom's birthday, Wednesday night we had spent flying and now it was Thursday night. I think we were all about ready to crash. But in the end, we had our little boy and we headed to our hotel.
Legally when you adopt a child, you can name the baby whatever you want. In the case of Baylie, we have a closed adoption, so we gave her a completely different name from the one her birthmother had selected. In the case of Willie, his birthmother seemed very concerned that we would change his name, so out of respect to her, we added the first name she had chosen to the name we had already selected. She had named him Jalin.
We knew what his official name was and we tried calling him variations on it: Jalin, Will, William, Waylan, etc. In the end, we settled on Willie. I think that will eventually become Will.
2 comments:
I loved getting to know our bmom...will this adoption be more open then?
My heart. *clutches chest* This is so tender. Thank you for sharing all this. (((HUGS)))
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