On Motherhood

I am so grateful to be a mother. For much of my life, I thought this desire would be withheld from me. I prayed and cried and gave myself shots and each month my hopes were dashed. Over and over again. I was almost 40 years old before this blessing was finally given to me. After adopting, many women still mourn the fact that they can't have a biological child. That was never my experience. Once we adopted Baylie, the hole in my heart was filled and I never regretted not having a biological child. Two years later, Jalen was added to our family and I knew our family was complete. I have never needed anything more than them. I know God gave me the children I was meant to have. I hope I can be the mother they need to have.

This Mother's Day was sweet. The kids and David each made me a card and they each added a page to an activity book for me. Baylie made me a word search. Jalen drew a picture and I had to draw one like it. And David did a color by number. They worked really hard on it. I also got some good smelling hand lotion. They also made me a bouquet of Optavia bars.  

Before adopting Baylie, I hated Mother's Day. They would pass out a flower to the mothers and invite all women to stand up. I didn't like standing up. I would often slip out of the chapel or skip church all together. This flower is from the first Sunday where I was actually a mother - 12 years ago. I keep it to remind me of how grateful I am to finally be a mother and to also remind me of those women for whom Mother's Day is painful.

I am grateful to a loving Heavenly Father for letting me be a mother. And I am grateful for the birth mothers of my children for sharing their babies with me. It is a gift I try to never take for granted.