We're "That" Family

Wednesday when Baylie got into the van after school, I could tell something was wrong. She was about to cry. Baylie is a pleaser and the thought of disappointing someone is devastating to her. I asked her what was wrong and she was afraid to tell me. She told me to just look in her agenda.

Imagine my surprise when I looked in her agenda and learned that she had "said a very bad f-word" in class. We don't swear in our home (okay, David doesn't swear and I don't swear very often...). Neither one of us ever uses that particular word. I knew that Baylie had no idea what it meant.

We never did find out where Baylie learned the word. (We went through several versions of stories of where she learned it and discovered that we had more of an honesty problem than a language problem.) She told us that she thought it meant dirt, which led me to believe that someone must have told her it was a 'dirty' word and she took that literally.

The worst part was that she said the word out loud several times saying "F--- isn't a bad word!" I can just imagine all the little first graders who went home and asked their mommies what it meant. The first grade newsletter that came home the next day included a front page instruction to please tell your children not to use a word if they don't know what it means. Nice.

I was so sad that Baylie had this experience. She didn't even want to look in her agenda the rest of the week because she didn't want to see the note from her teacher. It was the first time she had ever brought home anything but a smiley face from school and she was crushed about that. She didn't get in trouble for saying the word, but she did get in trouble for not being honest.

She kept saying she was glad that tomorrow was a new day and she could start fresh. I think we were all happy about that.

Labor Day

Usually I try to plan something fun and memorable for three day weekends, but we don't have money right now and David needs to compose so we decided to do something small and close by.

Baylie went swimming with her best friend, Lindsay, so I don't have pictures of her. Jalen and I went to the zoo and met up with my cousin Christina and her family. Jalen loves playing with his cousin Nash. 

I forgot to get out my camera until we were walking back through the garden to our car.

I love spending time with this little guy!

There were tons of people floating down the river.

We finished the day by going to Publix only to discover that we were the cookie club winners for the month of August. How cool is that!! (We won a big cookie cake that we decided to order for David's birthday.)

It was a great day off!

My Evolving Views on Racism

Like many others, the recent situation in Ferguson, Missouri has had me thinking more about race and why it is such an issue in this country. Six years ago, something like Ferguson would have had me thinking about "them" and how "they" react by rioting and destroying their own community. Today my thoughts are very different. I still think the rioting is inexcusable. I don't know if the shooting was justified or not. I've seen evidence to support both points of view. The difference in my thought process is that now I think about it. I don't jump to conclusions. I think of the individuals involved and affected by what has happened. I no longer lump people together into a faceless group. It is not that simple. (I should add that people that jump to the conclusion that the cop was wrong just because he is white and the person he shot was an unarmed black teenager are guilty of the same kind of prejudice.) Regardless of the facts that end up coming forward, it is probable that there will still be many people that stick to their initial opinion of what happened.

Today I came across THIS video from Morgan Freeman, which I found thought provoking. I agree that black history is American history. Unfortunately, aside from slavery and segregation, black history hasn't really been included in American history. If we just went by the history books, we would be led to believe that black people have been nothing but oppressed and haven't contributed much other than an abolitionist or civil rights leader here and there. Black patriots, authors, scientists, political leaders, etc. are usually not mentioned. Nor are Latin American, Asian or other minority figures. I have nothing against Black History Month and I think we do need to talk about race, but I would love it if we evolved as a country to the point where these things weren't necessary. I just don't think we're there yet.

I guess my cultural evolution really started with my mission in Argentina when I learned to see people from Latin America in a completely different way, and now it has grown to include people of all different shades. Over the past six years - since we adopted Baylie - my mind has expanded in unbelievable degrees in relation to race, culture, relationships, history, religion and more. I still fight my internal prejudices and try to be aware of them. There is good and bad in everyone. All people are right about some things and wrong about others. Problems arise when we start to think of each other as groups instead of as individuals. We tend to cling to those that make us feel like we are right and that our viewpoints are on track. We don't like to consider that we may be wrong. I think this applies to all people, not just one race or group.

I don't have any profound words or solutions, but I do have an opinion about how to overcome racism and prejudice. It's very simplistic and naive, but I think it's the only effective long-term solution. It is for us to reach out of our comfort zones and make a conscientious effort to get to know and establish relationships with people from backgrounds that are different from our own. That applies to more than just race. It includes religion, politics, economics and more. I have often met people who have a preconceived notion of Mormons and are surprised to find that I don't fit their mold.

I want to follow the examples of my children. They don't have "white" cousins or "black" friends. They just play. They know that people look different, but it isn't a problem for them. They give everyone the same chance to be their friend. I know we're not there yet and things like Ferguson make it seem like we're further than ever, but my personal friendships convince me that there is hope. Things like Ferguson also remind me that I should be doing more and trying harder.

First Day of First Grade

Today was Baylie's first day in first grade. She was VERY excited and VERY nervous. And for those of you who notice these things, she is wearing the same shirt that she wore for the first day of kindergarten. She has only worn that shirt one or two times since then, but I think she found comfort in wearing it today. (It was her choice.) She also chose to wear her hair in a bun. I had voted for a natural afro, but when I got home from seminary, she had convinced her daddy to go with the bun.

We sure have missed her!

When Life Gives You Lemons

Baylie has been BEGGING all summer to do a lemonade stand. I have been pushing it off, partly because I was afraid she'd have her heart broken if no one bought anything. If there is one thing I can say about our amazing daughter, it is that she is persistent.

Finally, I realized that this week was the last weekend before school started. So she and her dad prepared for the lemonade stand that would make millions. I helped by making cookies and they squeezed three bags full of lemons. We asked our neighbors for permission to set up on their lawn. It was perfect - in the shade and on a prime corner.

We have a great neighborhood! So many people stopped and many just donated money. She was only out there an hour and a half before she ran out of lemonade and cookies. She made $57.47! We couldn't believe it.

That money is burning a hole in her pocket. We've given her ideas for wise purchases, but she wants to go to Frankie's Fun Park. She keeps asking me, "Tell me something else you always say we don't have enough money for." Maybe I should put her in charge of our family budget. In the meantime, Jalen walks around the house singing Alex Boye's "Lemonade." David orchestrated that song for a concert that summer so both our kids love that song.

David is trying to deal with the fact that Baylie makes more an hour than he does.

More Summer Fun

We only have a few days left before school starts again, so we are trying to cram in as much stuff as possible. On Wednesday we headed to the zoo. Jalen didn't get to come (I hate following through with consequences) and I think it was as much a punishment for Baylie as for J. She was bored to death without him.

First we went to the botanical garden. It was so beautiful! 

Baylie is such a poser!

Did I mention she likes to pose?

She also really likes to have her picture taken.

Natural frames.

We met up with some friends, so Baylie wasn't quite as bored.

I love this beautiful girl.

Today we joined our friends the Carters at the State Museum. It's a great museum and they have added on a planetarium, observatory and IMAX 4-D theater.

The planetarium was great but the movie was a little old for the kids. It was about the 7 Wonders of the World and the Solar System. My kids didn't understand most of it, plus they had a hard time not talking - and talking under a dome tends to echo.  

The dinosaur section of the museum was so fun.

They have these robotic dinosaurs that move. It was really cool.

My little paleontologist.

The telescope let us peek at the sun.

The kids hopped a ride on a train.

Our favorite part was the IMAX theater. I was afraid it would e a little scary (it was ICE AGE), but the kids loved it. When the dinosaur sneezed and water was shot at us, Jalen called it "bless you." He asked, "Why did they spray us with that bless you?"

School starts on Tuesday and I am going to miss my little girl!

Happy Shark Week

Jalen's best friend, Ian, had a shark party today. Ian's mommy is VERY creative. 

Sharks & boats on a jello sea

Starfish sandwiches

Shark fins and salsa

Shark teeth

Gummy sharks

Seashell pasta

Coral reef cupcakes

Ian's sister, Sydney as shark bait

Walking the plank in shark infested waters

It was a blast!